Misconceptions about infidelity exposed

A marriage and family therapist has attempted to shed some light on common infidelity misconceptions.

In his book The First Step in Surviving Infidelity, American private practitioner Dr Robert Huizenga, who specialises in infidelity, says there are many misguided opinions of adultery.

Firstly, he says that infidelity does not mean the love an adulterer feels for their other half has dwindled and those looking for a bit on the side are not doing so because of failings in their own relationship.

Dr Huizenga also argues that the stigma secret affairs have collected as being "despicable" and "condemnable" is something that is unfounded.

In fact, he cites that many people, especially the media, subtly encourage playing away from home, as has been demonstrated in the mass public support gained by US golfer Tiger Woods after he admitted having several extramarital relationships.

Dr Huizenga believes that society has been "brainwashed" about infidelity, but it is not something with a clear set of boundaries or definitions.

UK-based radical couples therapist Esther Perel recently told the Guardian that monogamy is no longer something that is standard in a relationship and is instead something which must be "negotiated".

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