It seems that Anne Boleyn was guilty as charged by her husband Henry the Eighth.  New research in a book by George Bernard a historian suggests that Queen Anne had some royal ‘rumpy pumpy’ because she was pissed of with the king.    At the time there were even rumours of a bit of brotherly incest along with 5 possible lovers.  Not much we can do about it now but Cheryl Cole seems to be doing plenty about prize dork Ashley who has been given his marching orders.  The idiot who played around whilst married to the sexiest Geordie known to man has been given his red card – about time too.

From time to time we read that there is pressure to incorporate bits of Sharia law into the UK juridicial system.  Would we really wish to ever go down this route?  Take the example of Malaysia (truly Asia!) which is drifting slowly into Sharia appeasement and increasingly flogging their women who get caught having affairs.  It is only a short step from flogging to stoning

One of my clients is in for a flogging at least,  his wife found his spare mobile which did not have a password (careless or what?) – from what he told me a caning would be a good result.   On every mobile phone I’ve ever had there is a setup procedure that prompts you to create a PIN.  Let this be a warning, spare phones need a PIN too.

Are you bored with the Derby and Grand National?  No problem there, Paddy Power are laying the odds on celeb adultery break-ups.  Will Cheryl dump Ashley and if she does will Lewis Hamilton cruise on over and soothe her broken Geordie heart? (6/1 as first suitor)  If you think Ashley and Cheryl are the next celebs to bite the dust you can get 4/5 at Paddy Power. John Terry will get you 6/1 Tiger and Elin are there at 3/1.  Alex and Katie get slightly better odds at 7/1 but then the ink is barely dry on their marriage contract.

It suprises me that celebrities who can afford a cupboard full of diamond studded mobile phones would send explicit texts on their main phone.  What level of dickhead is Ashley Cole??  But then I suppose if the object of your affection is yet another topless model like Sonia Wild you would hardly qualify as the brightest match in box.   I would never normally encourage any woman to dump her bloke for infidelity I would urge the fragrant Cheryl to rid herself of this embarrassing nobhead.

Yes, Tower Hamlets is the top scoring adultery centre of the UK.  A survey of 3000 adultery petitions for divorce puts Tower Hamlets frimly at the top with 29% of the total compared with a measly 2.9% in Islington.   Even more interesting was the fact that of those petitions in Tower Hamlets 60% were instigated by the women.  Obviously the men in Islington are better at hiding their activities which corresponds to the high percentage of clients Loving Links has in leafy North London.

So another wag hires Max Clifford to spill her heart out to the News of the World.  According to Max she is the hottest story in town.   That John Terry has been shagging around is hardly a suprise but I suppose I should mention it in my blog.  What concerns me is whether this should impact on his role as England captain and if so, why?   It seems to me extraordinarily hypocritical that the ‘great and the good’ of football/politics/media etc should be sitting in judgement on John Terry’s sex life.  It was only the other year that Farah (fire alarm) Alam was throwing her knickers all over the FA boardroom and most of the miscreants got little more than a slap on the wrist.   Terry will suffer in his pocket – as did Tiger Woods – when the sponsorship dries up.  This is fair do’s – sportsmen get sponsorship dosh when they match up to the image they present to their public.  It is not fair however, to suggest that sexual misdemeanours stop them heading the ball into the back of the net or hitting a ball into a hole that most of us can barely see.